The Peace Returns

I have been struggling for some time with a lack of peace. For me as a Christian, peace has been one of the best perks of being a Believer. I’ve had it in some very difficult situations like my husband telling me he was going to leave me (he didn’t), my daughter telling me she was moving in with her boyfriend’s family (she did) and watching my father take his last breath. But I’ve grappled of late with balancing rest and work and have not been peaceful.

Some time ago in my frustration I screamed at God, “What do you want from me?” I did not expect an immediate response but I got one. Inside my head I clearly thought/heard “Micah 6:8.”

God has responded to me many times with a Scripture reference so I immediately looked in my Bible to see what it says there. … “He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you?  To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly before your God.”  That was definitely as answer from on high!

Well, I try to act justly and I do love mercy but humility is so very hard for me. I have struggled with pride most of my life. How does a person balance self-sufficiency with being dependent on God? This morning I did some extra investigation into this passage and found that Israel wanted to offer a sacrifice to please God but that’s not what God wanted. He wanted them to live Micah 6:8.

Today I’ve laid out some ways for me to “walk humbly before my God.” I feel the peace now. It’s like I was trying to just offer some sacrifice to get God to accept me as I am but he wasn’t having any part in it. Now that I’ve made an active effort to ‘return to my first love” (Rev. 2) I’m feeling his pleasure. It feels good. We’ll see if I can live humbly for today.

Snares of Death

“The fear of the LORD is a fountain of life, turning a man from the snares of death.”

                                                                                                             Proverbs 14:27

I have been thinking of God as my buddy – in my heart I know he’s my friend but he’s also the God of the Universe. I need to remember who he is and

We’ve been talking about what the “fear of the LORD” is in my Sunday school class.

From the Scriptures below we’ve gleaned a summary.

“And now, O Israel, what does the LORD your God ask of you but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul…  Deuteronomy 10:12

‘The fear of the LORD – that is wisdom, to shun evil is understanding… Job 28:28

Let all the earth fear the LORD; let all the people of the world revere him. Ps. 33:8

Revere: To regard with reverence (honor or respect; profound respect mingled with love and awe); to venerate (to regard with reverential respect, or with admiration and deference

“He who fears the LORD has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge.” Proverbs 14:28

So to summarize: those who fear the Lord walk in all his ways, love him, serve him with all their hearts and souls. They shun evil, they reverence him and as a result he is a mighty fortress for their children.

I want that fortress for my kids so as I am able I WILL fear the Lord!

Why I love studying the Bible

I consider my life to be a work in progress. I’m not yet where (or who) I want to be but as the saying goes, “praise God I’m not what I used to be!"

Much of what I’ve learned from God I’ve learned through Bible study. Some I’ve learned one on one, just God and me and those are very precious lessons. But I’ve also learned tons in Bible studies with other people. It’s fascinating to hear other people’s perspectives on a passage.  I always marvel at how men and women often look at the same Scripture but get totally different applications from it.

Two studies I’m in right now are, “To Live is Christ” by Beth Moore in my JOY group and “Life’s Healing Choices” by John Baker in MUGGS.

I always learn plenty from Beth Moore but last Wednesday night was an exceptional lesson. On day 5 starting at page198 Beth taught us about “The Five Thieves of Contentment.” Of late I’ve been struggling with a restless spirit so this really peaked my interest. The five thieves are: pettiness, anxiety, destructive thoughts, resistance to learn and independence. Yep – I struggle with two of the three – destructive thoughts and independence. So since I’ve read this I’ve been working on both and have begun to once again feel “the peace that passes understanding.” It’s been glorious.

Then we were listing our hurts in “Life’s Healing Choices” and I was stunned to find that a childhood hurt could still bring tears to my eyes. All I could think was “why is this bothering me so now so many years later?”

The hurt was from the fact that nobody wanted me on his or her team on the playground. I was a terrible underachiever in relation to anything requiring physical prowess. I can still remember the feeling when we were choosing up teams. There was always a knot in my stomach and although I never cried I always felt like doing so.

So we were required to take our hurts to an accountability partner and express them. I went to my BFF Kathryn. I cried AGAIN when I told her about those feelings. I thought, “This is ridiculous! Why does this hurt so much?” We talked a little more and I did an exercise that I learned years ago. I imagined where Jesus was when I was going through these and I could clearly imagine him standing at my side saying, “I choose you Jill, and I want you on my team.” Oh what a sweet thought! Then in a little while Kathryn asked me to tell her again what happened on the playground. I did but this time there were no tears because I could imagine Jesus there, feeling my hurt and loving me through it. How precious it is to find Jesus in all our hurts.

Today I'm thankful for:

A warm house on a chilly, damp day
The smell of pot roast cooking
I've never had to go without shoes like so many in other countries
Being healthy enough to volunteer at Samaritan's Feet

The Bible as a Weapon or a Tool

After being a committed Christian since December of 1974 one would think that I didn’t have to repeat old lessons but alas sometimes I sure do need reminders.

Reading through the Proverbs with my Sunday school class I have found that it’s a whole lot easier to think of other people in my life who do the bad things instead of honestly looking at myself. When will I ever learn that the only person I can change is myself?

Well perhaps I am learning because now when these thoughts enter my mind I think to myself, “but what about you Jill?” I may not be guilty of being a mocker or a sluggard but there are a few things that convict me in Proverbs.

I reject using the Bible as a weapon against others. I am nobody’s Holy Spirit. When I think inside my head, “that person is not living in accordance with Scripture” I have to reject that thought. My plank-filled eye doesn’t please Jesus. I need to work on Jill – I need to use the tool of the Bible to smooth out my rough edges.

Perhaps it’s a good day to read Psalm 119 and note all the times I see I, me and my.

Scripture for today:

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?” Matthew 7:3

Three things I’m thankful for today:

Pecan encrusted chicken

Pictures of summer flowers in the dead of winter

Lazy Sunday afternoons in a cozy warm house

Keep it Succinct!

I have been a follower of Christ since December of 1974. I am in the habit of spending my first minutes of the day with God and my Bible. Sometimes that time becomes just a habit and I don’t really get in touch with God. That usually happens when instead of following what I think God would have me do I work on what I need to teach in Sunday school – that kind of takes the joy out of it. It points to my tendency to make productivity my god. I’ll cover that another day. TODAY I’m going to share what God has been teaching me this week since I gave my Sunday school class the assignment to teach the class themselves for the next 3 weeks. They are to share what God teaches them as they read through the Proverbs. Our assignment this week was Proverbs 10-16.

Being the overachiever that I am I had a ball with this assignment BUT I’m hoping that I won’t need to share what I learned because so many of them will be sharing. We had 28 last Sunday so if only a few of them share I shouldn’t need to talk. But I’m excited about what I learned so I thought I’d share it here.

Proverbs is a cut and dry “do this don’t do that” book. It lists positive things to do and negative things to avoid. When I first became serious about following God it was a favorite because I like knowing what God likes. I had learned the hard way that “my arms are too short to box with God.” Life is much more pleasant for me when I’m pleasing Him.

It didn’t take me long to see an applicable proverb for me. Proverbs 10:19 says

“When words are many sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.” NIV

“The more talk, the less truth; the wise measure their words.” The Message

Enough said!